Friday, November 2, 2007

Redemptive Clarity


“It is not good to have zeal without knowledge, nor to be hasty and miss the way.”
(Proverbs 19:2)

“Better a patient man than a warrior, a man who controls his temper than one who takes a city.” (Proverbs 16:32)

So, what comes to mind? “Jumping to conclusions” “Think before you speak.” “Haste makes waste.” “Shoot first - ask questions later.”

People do not like confusion or tension. Sometimes those feeling cause them to have “zeal without knowledge” – i.e. to have a knee jerk reaction. They simply do not want to be confused or in tension. Therefore, they want to do something about it.

This is a good time to ask a question. Slow it down, stay confused a little longer, and ask a question, such as, “I am confused about ________ and I need some more information. I have a few questions. Would you mind helping me for a moment?”

I remember a family who made a quick decision without having all the facts. Most of the family members came to the same conclusion about one of the other family members. You see, “he” was the problem.

Actually, “he” was not the problem. The problem was not having all the information they needed to make a good decision. They were confused and, sadly, they drew their conclusions based on confusion without asking for clarity. Their confusion grew as they talked about “him” instead of talking to “him.” This led to a preemptive zeal that said “he” was the one to blame.

After five years of alienation, pain, and separation, one member finally asked a question about the confusion and tension most everyone felt by this time. The answer to his question brought a fresh perspective to which he responded with, “Oh, now I understand” - i.e. “he” was not the problem. This was the redemptive ah-ha moment. Yes, the light went on! Why didn’t the family member ask this question five years ago? Five years of broken relationships could have been avoided.

Nevertheless, it is never too late to reconcile. Ask for clarity today. Experience the ah-ha moment. Sometimes, gaining new information means you can make a new decision – a redemptive decision based on clarity . . . and not confusion.

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